Aug 4, 2007

How To Destroy Dr Seuss In Two Easy Steps

Nothing is sacred. From the lives of great artists like Kerouac i came to believe that you are better off having your work acknowledged after your death rather than having to deal with the difficulties success can bring surrounding your creative outlets. Unfortunately, it appears that your art can also be bastardized once you are no longer around to maintain it's integrity.



i grew up on Dr. Seuss. i am quite a fan of the man. Currently, his work is being destroyed. How can someone who's become such an icon be so compromised? Simple, and it all starts with Jim Carey. First: the Grinch. They had to pad this story with songs just to stretch it into a seasonal cartoon. The Seuss himself oversaw it and it became a classic.



A few years ago someone (we all know who Cunningham) decided to turn it into a full-length movie. How do you turn a short children's book into a feature length movie? You add insulting side stories to fill time. How do you ruin it even more? Hire a complete HAM to play the leading role.
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Well, there are lots of Seuss classics out there and Christmas has been abused so many times before that it's grown a thick skin from all that scar tissue. Sure all too many a cheese-ball valedictorian have included "Oh, the places we will go..." into their pathetic graduation speeches but we still have the Lorax and good olde Horton... oh no... not you Horton!
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Yes, terror attack number two, Jim Carey has his sites on destroying yet another Dr. Seuss character. He has teamed up with the Pixar wanna-be's who created 'Ice Age' to drag the most peaceful of all Seuss characters down into the gutter. They are making a movie based on 'Horton Hears A Who'. Blasphemy! Are there so few people in Hollywood with original ideas that they continuously stoop to the level of 're-imagining' creative people's ideas. If you work in the movie industry but have not one creative bone in your body, change careers and become a movie critic. Stop destroying movies with pathetic re-makes and stop trying to convert children's books that can be read in ten minutes into hour and a half long movies.
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Jim Carey has now joined the ranks of Celine Dion in my book: the fact that they are inhaling oxygen somewhere on this planet at this moment bothers me to no end. Fuck... not Horton man, not Horton...

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