Groceries

Tonight i went out for a quick grocery run. Not a full fledged grocery shopping event where i wear my iPod so that no one tries to interact with me and deter me from my mission: get food, get kleenex, and get out. This was just a quick stop to get what i needed for lunches this week so i left the iPod at home. Woah nelly...

i was perusing the dental floss selection. There's something about grocery store floss displays and convenience store beverage displays that leave me perplexed. Maybe it's the myriad of choices or all that bright colored plastic but i can never make a quick decision when faced with either.

All of a sudden i hear someone singing horribly high pitched bad hip-hop. i look over to find a Backstreet wannabe rounding the corner to come up my aisle fully pretty-boyed out with blonde moused up hair, matching chin-strap beard thing, white sweater, baggy tan Abecrummy cargo pants and big white sneakers.

There i am in my Dickies (filthy from post-work yard clean-up), black hooded sweatshirt, and shaved head staring this cat down with lowered brow partially in a look of bewilderment, partially hinting 'what's your story'. Backstreet doesn't even miss a beat. In fact, he turns it up to ELEVEN as he stops at the hair-care products belting it out now at the top of his lungs. No head phones mind you, just a-capella. Stunned, i quickly just grab whatever floss first catches my eye and high tail it through the mid-aisle break in the beauty products aisle.

My hasty exit into the next row startles a mother and her two daughters who scatter in three different directions. i seem to have disrupted their deodorant selection process. A cosmic game of grocery store pool. What a suburban exemplar of the butterfly effect. What chaos theory equation could possibly have predicted that series of events?

It took George Lucas and Stephen Cobert having a light saber duel to snap me out of my shell-shock from having experienced such randomness during what should have been a simple errand. Whoa nelly indeed.